Mistakes...I have done a whole bunch of them in my life, but I always try not to regret any of them. I have come a long way since I have started this long journey. Now that I have come this far I feel more mature perhaps much stronger, my personality changed morphing my feelings for you with it.
Its funny how things turn out to be, everything happens when you least expect it to happen. I always told myself that the day I meet you I was just too early now that you decided to call my name I'm afraid you are simply to late. I know you don't believe me but I loved you even if I tasted your poison over and over again, and still I fell for you time and time again. I know you don't believe me but I'm ready to turn my back on you without ever looking back.
I am not sad, I am just angry. Angry for the way I have been treated. For the many times I have been deceived, and for the fact that I let you deceive me in the first place. I can't hate you, no! I simply can't, but you do make me angry. Angry not with yourself but with my own self for believing in you and all of your lies. I believe you even when I know you lie, guess this is what stupid sentiments lead to. Go on you can lie to me, pretend you really mean what you say.
You play the role of the one who is holy, making me look like I was the one who was wrong. But can't you see? now they know it was you all-along. I am ready to face the mistakes I commit, but I'll be taking you down with me making you choke and drown in your own contradictions and lies.
I know you don't believe me but if you ever need me I be there, this is how much important you have been to me. I have been here before, so now I know the game you play, and besides the game is not fun if we'r not two to play. So don't try to force words down my throat this time, I'm not a child any more. Long I have learned that perfect does not exist...
How does it feel now that you lost your king's throne?
We constantly learn, we learn from those who show us to be better and we learn even more from those who want us to be worst by showing us what wrong is.
Picture by tumblr (Attaining Nirvana)
You must have to came to Lisbon ;)
ReplyDeleteYes, Yes, Yes Francisco one day I'll come give Lisboa a visit :)
ReplyDeleteWell-written.
ReplyDeleteLoved the notes, too. :)
Thank you Balqis so glad you liked it :)
DeleteIt's not easy waking from the biggest dream you ever had, more to know thatthings in real were a "bit" different.
ReplyDeleteIt's always a shock.
Life sometimes is hard.
Cruel, maybe.
Like you say and very well, perfection in the way we imagine doesn't exist. Its an utopia to think it exists. However, we all can be "perfect".
Being able to be true and honest to ourselves, true to our beliefs, able to know when we are making a mistake and having the humility to say, "yes I was wrong" - I think that is what make us real and "perfect" - in a way.
Many times I was pissed off with you because of the situation you describe on the post. I simply hate seeing people I love being used and treated in a way like that. We even fighted over cause of that. Well, past is past and I'm glad you finnaly moving on, being able to come out from that trap you falled long much time ago. If there's something that is positive is the fact that you grown more and became more stronger and wise. And the positive thing was the fact that you keept your pure heart.
Lots of love,
Gwanni
Past is past you are right, but its good to look back at times and say "God I have come a long way!!!" guess its somehow makes you feel proud of your own self. I hate the fact that I was used, sometimes I nag about it yes but its but its not a big deal hehehe :P
DeleteNo matter how hurt we get, we always come back for someone whom we care cuz heart is selfless.
ReplyDeleteThings do turn up when we least expect them. When you are in heights of being happy you are turned down the most saddest part of life.
Can we move on? IS it so easy?
No matter how much we get hurt we always come back.... true! very true indeed.
DeleteGuess even a microscopic change would feel as if the world is falling on us when we are so happy...let alone when something very dear to us fades or fails to remain the same...
No its not easy no one ever said it was, life itself is not but we do go on. life always finds a way to do go on..
Thanks again dear Nidz :)
If you found the ways to move on, do share dear Hotei..
ReplyDelete"never cry on spilled milk" I try to hold onto that!. If something happens we cant just throw our life down a cliff, we try to pick up the bits and pieces and carry on... every day will be a lil bit better then the one before....every separation or loss needs its mourning period.
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