Dear Lisbon

I don't know what hurts more...to love and not be loved back or loosing love....

Got out of bed and still half asleep made it to the kitchen, made my self tea...yeah TEA, not coffee as usual!. Then made it to the bathroom opened the cold water that now is freezing cold, but have to say that made the trick!. Looked in the mirror, stared at my reflection with blood shot eyes and dark circles, tired from lack of sleep and the long hours staring at an idle laptop screen.

I can't just ignore these voices in my head, I must share, I must remove these thoughts I have...I must face the ghost of you.








Dear Lisbon,


I wish to share a few thoughts with you. I might have overreacted  last time. Guess I gave you no time to reply, to answer my 100 questions in 1 minute!.  I reflected and thought a lot during the day.. then to hear your voice after such a long time, to be able to hear you breath and giggle in my ears. I can't get you out of my head yet again, your voice still resonates in my head leaving me with a bitter sweet migraine. 

What is it that constantly makes you come back, now somehow, somewhat even more determined  then ever?. Now you plan to come to me... I'm scared to face it...I'm scared to face you.  What is it that I feel?. This feeling inside is new, yet I know it somehow. Its like to explore something that is forbidden to me something that I was never supposed to have...and now, its in sight and can't wait to grab it and make it mine!. 

Yet this is just a dream nothing else nothing more. One day I'll wake from this dream, to find out the truth. 

Yours... the pawn of destiny 

Picture by tumblr